Over the last fifteen years, I’ve had the privilege of being passionately committed to the service of two spectacularly beautiful feminine personalities. Unfortunately, as women like that tend to have a lot of dirt dumped on them, neither of them understood the depth of their beauty. In the second case, I finally found myself whispering across a crowded room, “Please, please, please. Please come into yourself. We need you here so badly.”
While I’ve been physically lonely for a long time, this process of calling beautiful women into the world has its positive benefits. I dance alone most Saturdays, but I dance with the joy of knowing that my loving is connected to a purpose that I find to be precious.
Many women respect that intention, but there are those that see my devotion as a resource to be turned to their benefit. The methods they use are pretty crude, and I have to say: after you’ve been sleep deprived for long enough, being beaten on by lust tends to lose its luster. So I really appreciate it when a woman approaches me with the attitude that she just wants to know what it feels like to step into devotion. Most of the time they finish dancing with me and go off into bliss with their lovers.
My most powerful experience of the impact of psychic wounding came under such circumstances. At the venue I haunted, a man in a rainbow tunic would show up occasionally on a field trip with a group of emotionally disturbed followers. One evening, I noticed a woman – let’s call her Deanne – staring at me. She seemed really timid, so I asked her to dance with me. When we got to the dance floor she announced “But I can’t go away with you or take my clothes off.” Realizing who I was talking to, I agreed. The song was a little forward, and Deanne looked uncomfortable. She agreed that she didn’t like the music, so I told her to come and get me when she heard something that she liked.
I kept on dancing by myself, and Deanne finally joined me again. Her movements were really wound up, and I just tried to invite her to move around into the space I left behind me on the floor. She began to play a little bit, and I had this strange sense of her opening up. Putting my hands on either side of Deanne’s head, I took hold of the threads of personality that she had wound up so carefully in herself, and attached them to the joy that my friends and I had built on the dance floor. I was overwhelmed by this glorious surge of energy, the likes of which I had never before experienced. Deanne just smiled and returned to her friends.
Scott Peck, author of People of the Lie, remarks that ‘evil’ is ‘live’ spelled backwards. From the physicist’s perspective, living is the process of investing the world with our spirit. Somebody had pounded Deanne out of the world, leaving her not even her body to inhabit. What happened that night, though, gave me an absolute conviction that evil is impotent in the face of love. That surge of energy was the joy of spirits welcoming Deanne back into the world. It was as though they had been waiting for her to reclaim them.
When we are first taught about sin, it’s as a prophylactic against evil. “Thou shalt not kill” definitely qualifies. Most of the Law of the Pentateuch (the Jewish holy books) can be interpreted in this way. The goal was to avoid corruption in the relationships between the people, the sacred land, and the God they worshipped.
The problem with the law is that it yoked guilt to evil: it created sin. This was the uniquely human evil that entered the world with the fall of Adam and Eve. Before that time, evil happened and living creatures just shrugged it off and moved forward. Man ate of the fruit of the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil and began to ask “why?” From that point, whenever evil happened, our questioning minds looked for a place to affix the blame, and our materialistic tendencies led us to assign fault to the person that committed the sin.
When Jesus died for the forgiveness of sins, he sought to liberate us from this burden of guilt. As he put it “It is not the well that need a doctor, but the sick.” Implicitly, he is asserting “Who cares why it happened? Shouldn’t we just fix it and move on? Here: let me show you how love works.” In the most impressive case: the oppressor Saul goes blind on the road to Damascus and is healed to become Paul, the foremost Christian evangelist of his time.
Healing through love is the absolute bedrock of Christian ethics. Those that prefer to judge sinners might better focus their energies on learning to emulate the master that they adore. You’ll have a lot more fun when love moves freely through you. Assigning guilt just gets in the way.
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The effect of eating of the tree is not that they die, but know they are naked, and have shame. The tree of life was not forbidden. The law informs sin, as Paul writes there in Romans, in a detailed discussion of law and sin. Law guides the penance that is a death that leads to birth and Life. Hence the end is not the crucifixion, but the tree of Life in the New Jerusalem. Paul too is an authority on the love between man and woman, in the mystery discussed in Ephesians.
Thanks again for the nice essay and story of that healing moment. See you again soon!
I’m looking forward to further discussion! If you would provide specific scripture references, I’d be happy to delve more deeply.
I see nakedness and death as a piece of the same outcome. The original admonition from God regarding death and the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil [Gen. 2:17] is pretty direct. In the view of the spiritual collective, to “die” is to be separated from relation with God. That separation is manifested concretely in Adam and Eve’s attempt to hide themselves by donning clothing.
Regarding the tree of life in the New Jerusalem, you may find interesting my response to Sera Beak’s Redvolutionary Theology: https://everdeepening.com/2015/10/29/whitenessing-the-truth/.
Reading Paul is always interesting for me, because he was trying to guide people forward from where they were, while Jesus simply manifested WHAT COULD BE. I tend to focus on the latter, and so always remind myself that Paul was not Christ. You’ll find more on the topic in https://everdeepening.com/2015/04/01/robbing-peter-to-play-paul/.
Hmm, manifest the tree? Wisdom is “a tree of life to those that lay hold…,and while the crown of the wise is their woman, a good wife is the crown of a man (Proverbs, #3:18) Whatever the tree is, its leaves are given for the healing, of the nations, and the fruit is not mentioned. There is some question as to whether the fruit is eaten in the mortal body, or only in paradise in the new or spiritual body. None of the Saints, even, speak well or clearly on the mystery of the trees. The Genesis requires long, patient and careful reading, and probably Hebrew. But watch the alteration of what God says to Adam and what Adam says to Eve, then what the serpent says to Eve, then what God says.. Which tree was forbidden? And what the result? And how does this fit with the rest of Genesis 2, not to mention these with 1: 26 and all of 1. Lots of fun! But we do not even have the terms for the symbols, then everyone goes to discuss what it implies! Who is it that Cain fears will kill him after the mark (4:14)? Were birds created before man, or after (2:7)? These questions are there to let us know we cannot yet read it!
We are in perfect agreement on this! John was trying to express spiritual evolution in material terms. Until we become “like unto angels”, it will be almost impossible for us to understand.
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